Sappy Blog Alert!!!

I’ll be the first to admit it…I’ve been stuck in a sucky place for awhile now. Going through fertility and trying to get pregnant for 17 months, as you see everyone around you pop out kids, is not a fun time. I am usually a pretty positive person, but the last year has been a rough one. I watched as my grandpa struggled and lost his battle with ALS, became very sick and got diagnosed with PCOS, and ever since then have been going through fertility to get pregnant with no success. As much as you try not to let all of those things get you down, they still do. 

Just tonight, while having a kitchen heart to heart with Jamie as we do from time to time, I realized something….for the first time in a long time I had a great weekend and was so happy with life. There are so many reasons why it was a great weekend, with the number one reason being….I finally downloaded the new Miley Cirus song and have been dancing my ass off all weekend to it!

Seriously, so many great moments this weekend…

• Getting to see Lindsay and meeting Avery for the first time
• Dancing to my iPod while cooking on Friday night
• Having a blast tailgating even completely sober!
• Getting to see tons of friends and family
• Enjoying my new magnetic tailgating huggie
• Laughing so hard at BW3 that my abs hurt the next day
• Getting to play hair dresser and attempting to cut Matt’s hair

So watch out world….I’m back bitches!!! I’m just going to try to keep this frame of mind going and let a baby come to me instead of thinking about it all of the time. And if times get tough…hopefully some “Nodding my head like yeah and moving my hips like yeah” from Miley will get me though it! Love you all! 

 

The ABC’s of Sarah

I’m sure that you might have seen this on Facebook, my friend Lindsay (a ssquared super fan) sent me hers and I was very entertained. So here it goes people!

A = “Are you f**king kidding me?” probably my favorite saying

B = Bug…used to drive one and now has been replaced by the Family Ride that we use to pick up all of our kids. 

C = Cainodraino, my alter ego who is sometimes really good at Nintendo and board games

D = Diet Mountain Dew baby

E = Eggs over easy – only way to go

F = I cuss like a sailor…this one shouldn’t be hard to figure out! Close second = Facebook

G = German…my minor in college

H = Hannah Banana! I heart my sissy.

I = Illini duh…cannot wait to tailgate on Saturday!

J = Jamie, I love his grouchy ass!

K = Kellogg’s Fruit Loops….best cereal ever!

L = Laugh. I do it all of the time, even at my own jokes!

M = Metformin, the medicine I have to take before each meal.

N = Nose…its big, but somehow I’m a mouth breather in my sleep  :-O

O = Office…I cannot wait for the new season. 

P = Polar pop…the only reason I make it through each day!

Q = Queenie…my Dad’s nickname for my mom

R = Relic…my Aunt Cherie just gave me one today and hopefully it gets me pregnant in no time!

S = Sarah B. my other half that lives two hours away

T = Tallulah my Jack Russell Terrior that I am obsessed with

U = Unity, my high school

V = Viennetta…what ever happened to that shit…it was so good

W = Whore (Jamie did this one)! I would have put “Whateves”

X = the roman numeral for the amount of years that I will soon be out of high school

Y = Yearbook Advisor…my old position at work 

Z = ZZZZZZ   time for me to freaking go to bed!

 

Mmmmm…steak

Yep…I’m going to have to avoid the County Market butcher counter for awhile thanks to Jamie’s dad. Jamie’s parents came into town last weekend and we wanted to cook them a big dinner. Steak seemed like a good idea. Since we are super awesome hosts, we called his dad and asked what kind of steak they both liked. Mark said, “I like Ribeyes and your mom likes Tube Steak.” Not realizing that his dad was being dirty….we head over to County Market. 

We look in the meat area and don’t see any Tube Steak, so we asked the butcher for help. Here is how the conversation went down…

Jamie: “Yes, Hi, we are looking for Tube Steak”

Butcher: (awkward look) “I’m sorry, did you mean Cubed Steak?”

Jamie: “No, my dad told me that my mom liked Tube Steak”

Butcher: (now really makes a face and says nothing)

Jamie: “Nevermind this will do” and Jamie turns and proceeds to checkout very quickly.

I still didn’t get it until the next day with Jamie and Mark were talking about it and then it all clicked. I have been randomly laughing about this all day. Looks like I’m going to have to lay low and shop at Schnucks for a few weeks! 

I am addicted to Google and really should have googled tube steak before we went shopping. I googled it tonight and this was the first link…

TUBE STEAK: Army lingo for the male sexual organ; the penis. Typically used in the phrase “tube steak & white gravy,” a reference to an ejaulating penis, inserted into one of the drill/platoon/top sergeants’ numerous gay slurs directed at subordinates. (courtesy of Urban Dictionary)

No gravy was served at the meal we made

 

Suck it Jessie!!!

I’m a dreamer…I periodically think of how I am going to spend my lottery winnings, fantasize about having twins, and hope I get to one day see Tully star in commercials. Although I’d like for all of these things to happen, things don’t usually go my way. Tonight….one of my dreams came true….Jessie was voted out of Big Brother.

My obsession with Big Brother started a few years ago. I have come to really love some of the people on the show. Jessie is not one of them. He was on last session and I was thrilled when team Dan kicked him to the curb. So you can understand my complete disgust with CBS for letting Jessie back in the house for another go this season. So tonight, I was hoping and praying (it is sad how many times I thought about Big Brother this week), that Jessie and Natalie would get nominated and that Jessie would go home….AND IT DID!!! I immediately was shaking and was shrieking at the TV. Thank you Baby Jesus! Now if you could work on the lotto, twins and Tully being a commercial star….I’d be set!

 

As Promised….two months ago

Dear Loyal Blog Readers,

I have completely sucked at life when it comes to blogging. Since my sister called me out for sucking, I am back and ready for more blogging action. I am going to only blog once or twice a week this time around, so check in with me here and there. I know what you’re thinking….I need more Sarah than that….well, I have an internet life too, and need to give Facebook, Craigslist, TextsFromLastNight, and general Googling a huge chunk of my time!

The Long Awaited Announcement!!! 

In my last blog announcement on May 29th, I said that I had a big announcement. Sorry to keep you all waiting…I’m sure that so many things were going through your head. Rhinoplasty? Will Sarah be the next Octomom? Did she finally try raisins and like them? 

The real announcement is…..

After losing 41 pounds since being diagnosed with PCOS, I can finally fit in my wedding dress again…and I have pictures to prove it! Thanks to all of my loyal blog readers (probably just Hannah) for sticking with me! Look for some badass blogs to come your way in the near future!

Wish Tully could have been there on the big day!

This involved me setting the camera, running and jumping to Jamie all within 10 seconds!

 

I found Sarah’s car in Belgium…

I cannot believe that while Tim and I were in Belgium, we spotted Sarah’s car at the North Sea:

Sarah's Car - Side View

Now, I know you may not think this looks exactly like Sarah’s car, but trust me, once you see the licenese plate, you will realize that this truly is Sarah’s car:

Sarah's Car - Rear View

 

Papercuts and Marker Fingers Here I Come…

About two years ago, my mother and I started making greeting cards ourselves. We went out and bought all of the supplies we needed, and now we have quite the collection of crafting crap. Here’s the problem…whenever I need a card, 9 times out of 10 I buy one instead of making one. The sad thing is that I have fans (Aunt Cherrie) that just love when I make homemade cards. So I am going to make a vow to quit sucking in the card making department. I am going over to Mama Cheryl’s tonight and I am going to be a card making machine. My new goal is to make some variety packs, so that I always have a card in a pinch. I’ll post some of my works of art on here this weekend. 

Blog Preview Alert!!!! I have some exciting news that I am going to reveal on here on Sunday so stay tuned loyal fans…..and no, I am not pregnant, so get that out of your minds before I start getting crazy phone calls.

 

Get Me a Walker!!!

I don’t know if this is due to me turning 27 this summer or what, but I seriously think that my body is falling apart. I wake up every morning and my hips are killing (and not from what you think it is from all you sickos) and my shoulders are popping like crazy. So, I am either getting old or Jamie is kicking my ass while I’m sleeping. I think that I am going to have to try out some yoga action to see if that helps. Otherwise sign me up for a walker….with a basket and a horn, of course!

 

check out DaBossy!

I starteded a blog. You’ll see this sometime in August when one of the S’s decide to post this

http://dabossy.wordpress.com

Check it out homies!!

 

Why Sorority Life is the answer to all of life’s problems.

There are some people who have experienced the goodness that is Sorority Life. There are some people (coughHannahcough) who do not believe in it’s creamy goodness. Here is my essay on why Sorority Life is the solution to many if not ALL of life’s problems.

I have recently stumbled upon my new life mission known as Sorority Life. While on the exterior it may seem like a silly little game that tout’s simple sisterhood one must play it for several hours, think about it while you are working and have dreams about accessories to truly experience it’s wonderfulnessment.

If everyone played SL, all the crazy world leaders and nutjobs would need not fight any longer. It can all be taken care of with Burn Lists and rival attacks. There is no measure of joy you can feel from attacking someone and taking all their money and terminally depressing them. It is almost orgasmic.

If everyone played SL, we would all be really skinny because you can’t eat for fear that someone will slap you and go hide in the spa so you have to be ever ready. You have to vote for your house members to keep them happy so they will in turn vote for you and not remove you from their house (such as football widow who I will now put on the Burn List).

If everyone played SL, we would all be wizards at math because you really need to know how many Prius’ you should have and that the combined charm of prius’ outweigh Hummer’s dollar for dollar. Math is crucial in figuring out if you should quit your job as an Alumni Marketer and become an Entertainment Columnist.

In summary, SL will keep you skinny, keep crazy people from trying to destroy each other and others, sharpen your math skills, provide hours of thrilling pleasure and is great for someone who cannot walk much because they have a really gross infected toe and subsequent leg cramp from walking funny.